The Bucket List is an excellent movie and this song captures not only the biggest meaning of the movie, but also one of the biggest lessons in life. There are times when we often wish we had told someone something or had a voice that was heard.
Often times we’re so caught up in our busy lives that we forget to see the bigger picture. This song reminds me that not only is life short, but that it’s often moved through without saying the things that we need to say. This is a very personal message for me.
Had I five minutes with someone there are so many things that I would say, but only one very important conversation that we never took the time to have. That one conversation could have changed the lives and paths of both of us, but we never made the time to have the talk always figuring that there was another day, but that day never came.
Sometimes we shy away from saying something for fear of what the outcome might be while other times we don’t want to “inconvenience” the recipient if the message we need to get across isn’t a pleasant topic. This one missed conversation has caused a great deal of pain for not only myself, but it has inevitably affected all those who have crossed my path because I know that I am a different person today because that conversation never took place.
I held a lot of resentment about this. I really do feel that I would have been a different person had we shared the things we needed to share. I cannot change the past, but I can learn from it and forge my future differently. I’ve spent a lot of time thinking about this conversation and honestly I don’t know where I would begin or even what I would say, but I know that I wouldn’t do what I did then…Ignore it.
It’s like the elephant in the room that no one wants to talk about, yet they should talk about because it is the elephant in the room that inevitably changes the course of people’s lives and who they are.
Why then do we miss these moments or just plain refuse to have them even though we know that in the end we’d be better off had we said what we needed to say? In the end isn’t it better to say too much then to never say again what you need to say?
“Even as the eyes are closing do it with your heart wide open” These words are extraordinary. I do not want regrets in my life nor do I wish to look back and know that I didn’t say what I needed to say.
To my someone – While it is not possible for me to have this conversation with you, I know that you know my heart and you hear me. I forgive you for not having this conversation and someday I will forgive you for your part in all of this. Today, I cannot forgive whole heartedly because I’m still figuring out how to forgive myself for 21 years of silence and destruction. I can tell you that I love you beyond all measure and no matter what has happened I am who I am because of what happened. You have taught me the most important lesson in life and for that I thank you. No matter the past I am not who I was, but I am who I’m supposed to be.
